Anyone Can See It
by Obsidian Sphinx
Summary: Duo's musings about the awkward times in his and Heero's relationship.1x2 Yaoi. Complete.


Disclaimer: I don't own the show or anything involving it, save of course for this little obsession.

Author's Note: Well, I was restless and decided to write this. It doesn't have a whole hell of a lot of substance, in fact, it's kind of blah, but here it is. Enjoy! Happy Readings!

oxo

Anyone Can See It

By: Obsidian Sphinx

oxo

Considering the less than normal childhoods we had, the two wars, and the resulting truckload of emotional baggage, I think that Heero and I turned out alright. Granted, our definition of alright and the rest of the general population's definition of alright might vary a little, but we try. We live our lives successfully enough because if there's one thing we know how to do, it's work hard, and, as would be expected of us, we're damn good at what we do. No one at Preventer HQ has the level of skill that Heero does, and my junkyard business beats out most competitors around the colony cluster. I also run a pretty good side job in demolitions. Basically, shit around here doesn't blow up without my knowing and having a hand in the process.

So, normal is a little ways off for us; we're still learning. We pick up tid-bits of information here and there, and I think that we're slowly starting to get to normal, or at least as close to it as we possibly can. For example, our romantic relationship started in a fairly abnormal way and continued on that rocky slope for some time. I don't think either of us actually expected to _have_ a relationship in the first place. It just sort of progressed, and the next thing we knew the war was over, and we had an apartment together. Again, it was more out of convenience, but that attraction grew and grew, and finally we fell into this weird 'couples' routine. But the couples routine alone took some effort.

You'd think that after all of the injuries and near death experiences that we'd had, we'd be able to agree on little things such as the right way to stack the dishes or what to make for dinner; we never agreed. Routine came with learning to live with one another. We were both set in our ways, but Heero was worse off than I was. I'd grown up surrounded by other people, and we had all needed each other to survive. Sharing was a necessity in my childhood because there was never enough to fill every belly or cover every shivering body. Heero, on the other hand, grew up with himself. He was provided for so that he could operate at his optimum performance level, which meant that he didn't have an incredible amount of flexibility when it came to doing things. Heero was accustomed to doing everything Heero's way, and if I didn't want to go along with it then I was failing efficiency. Unfortunately, my ability to deal with people around me backfired sometimes. The fact of the matter was that I _had_ grown up having to share everything, I had rarely had any personal space, and things had gone the way that the majority preferred. When I got away from all that, and I was able to make some of my own choices, I developed a few anal-retentive habits. It just so happened that Heero's anal-retentive habits and my anal-retentive habits did not coincide, so yes, there were some knock-out fights, and most of them were dumb.

Heero and I couldn't even argue properly. We were young, inexperienced, stubborn kids, so the disagreements would lead to blows. We'd beat on one another until we had tired ourselves out, and we'd just go to sleep right there on the floor or draped over the furniture, whatever. When we would wake up, there wouldn't be any apologies at all, just food and quiet time. Nothing ever got solved. We had to learn how to argue like couples argued; arguments that eventually birthed a compromise. We managed to figure that system out by watching people around us and agreeing with the fact that we had each received one too many bruises.

To be honest, Quatre and Trowa were something of a role model couple for us. They hadn't seemed to take as long to work through their relationship issues. When they argued, no one knew about it because that's just how discreet they were. When Heero and I argued, everyone knew it because that's just how indiscreet we were. We tried to adopt the whole eye contact thing that Quatre and Trowa had. It seemed like they could hold complete conversations with one another just by staring. If there was a conflict, they waited until they had some privacy to duke it out. For some reason, Heero and I had to adopt a warped eye contact system. We didn't just stare; we glared, and sometimes our glaring matches made people more uncomfortable than our yelling matches. I don't think that even now we've been able to refine the system that much. People still know when there's trouble in paradise, but it's okay. Like I said, Heero and I take our own sweet time in learning to be together.

It amazes me that even after all of our conflicts I still want to be with him. Even more amazing, Heero still wants to be with me. Certainly, there are days when it's all I can do not to be in the same room with him, but those days are nothing compared to the days when I don't want to be in the same room with anyone else. And I think that's what the whole thing is about. We were students listening to the same lecture, and even though we took different notes, we both passed the pop quiz, you know? Like I said, Heero and I are alright, but not alone; not as individuals, and if we can see that, then anyone can.

-Owari


End file.
